In my last post, I shared about how having unreasonably high expectations for yourself can create a negative spiral of stress for you and your family. (I call it Guilty Mom Syndrome)
Now listen to this: when we find ourselves in this cycle of stress and expectations it is a HUGE indicator we are not spending enough time and energy on our own self-care.
Our lack of proper self-care is the root of many of our issues around stress, guilt and overwhelm, especially related to our family.
Typically when we hear the phrase “self-care” these days our minds jump to images of taking bubble baths, getting a massage or indulging in a glass of wine or chocolate. And yes, these are all forms of “self-care” – things that can recharge you.
But often times it’s not enough.
These small, pleasurable activities may help you take a load off in the moment, but is it really helping you live your life full of energy and joy on a regular basis or is it just helping you cope?
In my version of self-care, it’s doing the things that sustain you, that release pressure, little by little, on a regular basis, ahead of time so things don’t mount up and explode.
This could include things like, creating a habit of getting up early so you get a bit of “me time” in the morning, going to therapy or joining a creative group, addressing past hurts instead of avoiding them, going to the doctors and so many more things.
But the key is not trying to do all the things, all the time just because someone suggested it, but doing the right things, for you at the right time. It’s learning to tune in with your own needs and choosing to prioritize them, just like you do with your kids all day long.
You’re already a pro at noticing and addressing needs, but we just don’t always give ourselves permission to notice and address our own. So consider this your permission.
You have permission to prioritize yourself, to notice how you feel and do something productive about it, you have permission to take time to do something that truly brings you life and you have permission to protect these things.
Because not only does your well-being depend on it, but so does your family’s well-being.
So let me ask you, when was the last time you felt really alive and charged up for your day? When was the last time you felt like you were able to move with ease and grace from mess to mess, from stress to stress?
Mom life IS hard. It IS stressful and all consuming. But when we are “thin” we will have a much harder time handling these things.
And no, this is not about creating unreasonable expectations of being the perfect, happy mommy. This is about realizing that you are IMPORTANT. SO so important. And so worth prioritizing.
So are you ready to take a step toward prioritizing you TODAY?
I have put together an AMAZING FREE resource for you, called: The Self-Care Check-In Guide
It will take you just 15 minutes to read and complete this worksheet, but by the end…
1) You will have so much clarity around what you need to do right now that will actually start to fill YOUR tank. Not your friend’s tank, not the person who wrote a great self-care article, but you.
2) It teaches you how to discern what is right for YOU, right NOW. Not what worked for you last week, or what may work for you in the future, but what works right now.
3) You will learn how to make space for self-care even when you don’t think you can.